Being chosen should feel calm too
I used to associate butterflies with uncertainty. Now I’m learning that excitement can exist alongside security.
There is a particular kind of dating intensity that comes from not knowing where you stand. A message arrives and suddenly your mood changes. A quiet day feels much bigger than it should.
I once thought that nervous energy was proof of chemistry. Sometimes it probably was. Other times, I think it was simply uncertainty.
The connections I value now can still be exciting, but there is a steadier feeling underneath them. I know the other person wants to be there. I do not need to earn basic attention every week.
Calm is not boring to me anymore. It feels like having enough space to actually enjoy someone.
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